I couldn't sleep because last night we found out that we have lost both the babies. So I just wanted to let everyone know. We will probably be delivering them today. I also wanted to thank everyone for their love and support!
What I Wish Everyone Knew
I wish everyone knew that this hurt never goes away. We still need support, and I still need to hear my son and daughters' name. Now, even more than before, I NEED to have their lives validated.
I wish everyone knew ....that even though my babies' deaths were the most painful experience of my life, I am grateful for the pain, and I would still choose to have them even knowing that it would end the same....and I would give anything to cuddle them in my arms again, if only for a brief moment.
I wish everyone knew... that my heart leaps with joy every time someone asks me about my babies.
I wish everyone knew that a baby's age or size at birth or death does not determine to how much of a person he or she was or how much they will be loved or missed.
I wish everyone knew that an early miscarriage and/or losing a tiny baby is just as difficult and painful as losing any other child.
I wish everyone knew how much I need to talk about mybabies, and how happy it makes me when someone asks about them.
I wish everyone knew the struggle that I go through everyday to answer the simplest questions, like: How many children do you have?
I wish everyone knew it is ok to talk about my loss.
I wish everyone knew that I think of my babies all the time.
I wish everyone knew that I have completely changed because of my experiences.
I wish everyone knew how much I love and miss my babies.
I wish everyone knew how much I need to talk about them and remember them.
I wish everyone knew what it felt like to hold them, still, perfect, breathtaking and have to leave them.
I wish everyone knew what it felt like to long for just 1 more second with their baby. Maybe then they could truly cherish all the billions of seconds they get with theirs.
I wish everyone knew that us mommies who lose our babies carry them with us everywhere we go...for the rest of our lives...and to say we are changed...is putting it rather lightly.
I wish everyone knew and appreciated what an absolute miracle each and every child is, from conception to birth, viable and enviable.
I wish everyone knew that even though I can smile and go to work and "function" like everyone else, I'm not like everyone else.
I wish everyone knew that even if you don't know what to say to me, saying nothing at all is more painful than you can imagine. Ignoring me and never speaking to me again because it makes you uncomfortable to be around me is worse than being uncomfortable or saying the wrong thing.
18 comments:
Darcie,
I am truly sorry for your loss. It's comforting to know that your little one's were to perfect to stay here on earth and that they too came and accomplished their mission just like my little Tate. It doesn't make it any easier but I know that they are close by you at this time just like our Savior and Heavenly Father. The veil is so thin at a time like this so I KNOW with out a doubt you and your wonderful family are surrounded by angels. I am sending you an email as well so be looking for it.
Darcie, I love you!!!
I hope everything goes well today and please let us know how you are doing. You are so incredibly strong. Lots, and lots, BIG hugs your way!!!
Darcie!
Good luck today; I'm sure that it's going to be extremely difficult. We love you and are praying for you and your family. Please let me know if you need ANYTHING!!!!
we love you. no matter what we will be here for you. your friendship means so much to us and i'm so glad that we have lived so close that we could become closer as friends...as sisters. you are in our thoughts and our prayers.
Oh, Darcie. I'm so sorry. The Lord certainly has an interesting plan for each of us, doesn't he? I'm sorry for your loss. I'm praying for you.
I am so sorry Darcie. You guys are just so strong, I don't know how you do it. Good luck with everything today. You are so blessed to have your sweet little girl there to keep you smiling. We will keep you in our prayers.
glow
Darcie
I am so very sorry for your loss. You are truly a wonderful mom and wife and I know you are strong. Good luck with your delivery, you will do great I am sure. You are still in our thoughts and I pray for you every night before I go to bed. Love you, Lac
We are so sorry for you and your family, I know that you are a very strong girl, we will keep you in our prayers.
Dayton Family,
My heart goes out to you. I'm so sorry for your losses. You're in my thoughts and prayers.
Brandon & Darcie~I'm truly sorry for your loss. You both have the faith to get through this. I know that the veil is thin especially at this time. I know that there are angels among all of us! Our Savior and Heavenly Father love you guys and your families! I'll keep in my prayers and also put your names on the temple prayer roll when I go in tomorrow to work there.
Oh my. Brandon, Darcie & Callie, I'm so sorry to hear about this. Please know that you're all in my prayers. Love to all of you. Karla
I am so sorry to read about this! You are such a strong woman. I hope everything went okay today. I'll keep praying for you and your beautiful family.
I am so sorry Darcie. I love you and I will keep praying for you! Love, Mary
oh Darcie, I am so sorry, my thoughts and prayers are with you! I wish I was there to give you a big hug!! Love ya Deanne Woolstenhulme
We're so sorry Darcie. You're in our prayers, may the Lord comfort you!
The Rhiens
Brandon, Darcie and Callie,
A big hug first of all to the strongest people I know! Second, I have no idea how it really feels to lose a child and my heart is still aching incredibly for your loss!!! Lots of prayers for peace and understanding for your family! I love you all!
We are so sorry, you are in our prayers.
Darcie,
I am sooo sorry. You are such a strong person. I was talking to my husband the other day and was telling him how amazing you have always been. I have always looked up to you for your strength and I KNOW you can get through this. We are praying for you guys!! Love you tons!!
ashley
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